Put Yourself Out

Sometimes we feel too safe, comfortable and cosy in our comfort zone or go along in our usual day-to-day routine without venturing out into the 'wider world'

Often when we do something a little differently - something unexpected happens.  After all - if you keep doing what you've always done, you'll keep getting what you've always got - as the saying goes.  So - if you do something different, you might get something different!

Also think about those times when you're not sure if you've got the energy or motivation to get out there and do something - either in your personal or business life.  Make the effort and you might be surprised at the opportunities that pop up and the chain reaction that can occur from one apparently random contact or connection.

Do something a little different, try something new, go somewhere you wouldn't normally go. Put yourself out  there and see what happens.

Walk A Mile ...

... in someone else's shoes.

We see the world through our own two eyes. How we interpret it is based on our own experience and knowledge of the world. That experience is developed as soon as we open our eyes at birth and start to understand and learn about the world around us.

Other people will have different experiences from us. They see the world differently and will interpret it based on their own knowledge, experience and values.

Someone's behaviour may seem strange or upsetting to us but not only does this tell us something about how and why we react in a certain way but it also tells us something about them.

Think before reacting - seek first to understand.

Other People's Deadlines

Respect other people's time in the way you'd expect them to respect yours. Everyone is busy these days and has demands on their time coming from all directions. They are not there sitting waiting for your email to land in their inbox, so that they can instantly respond. They're not waiting for your phone call just so they can respond to your every request.

Plan ahead. If you need something done by a particular time, give yourself a bit of slack. If it involves someone else, this is even more important. Don't dump something on someone and expect them to turn it around to meet your timeframe - especially if you haven't discussed this with them first.

I've seen people dump something on someone at the last minute or only with a few days notice and expect them to given an instant response or meet their deadline. Yes, sometimes we have to work to deadlines and at short notice but make this the exception not the norm.

Don't make your problem (or lack of planning) someone else's deadline.

The Quality Of Your Communication

I was on the phone recently to a company about a mistake they'd made. Now being a large, relatively faceless, global corporation, I was expecting it to be a "it's your problem, not ours" conversation.

After jumping through hoops with the inevitable voice response system, I was put through to a very polite person in customer services who dealt with my complaint in an efficient manner, acknowledged that there had been a mistake and was able to fix it. None of the "There's nothing I can do ... it's not company policy" attitude that we so often encounter.

That's what makes the difference between a company who treats it's customers with respect, admits their mistakes, acknowledges any complaints and deals with them in an efficient manner and one where a company is difficult to get hold of, has an arrogant, couldn't care less attitude and assumes they're always right and doesn't listen to their customers.

It comes down to the quality of communication. There are certain situations where if handled correctly a drama is prevented from turning into a crisis, however when handled incorrectly a storm in a teacup can become a hurricane. When emotions are running high, it's even more important to ensure that communication is clear, direct and timely and this can make a real difference to the outcome. Make it easy for communication to happen both ways and remember to listen and understand and don't just wait to speak.

Turning a bad situation round can save a relationship and maintain a reputation, making a bad situation worse will damage both the relationship and the reputation and it won't stop there. A disgruntled customer will tell more people than a happy one.

So keep your customers happy.

Random Connections

Recently I’ve been spending time in the world of social media. As well as being the latest way to keep in touch and connect, it’s becoming a more accepted way of marketing your business – if you look at it as an additional tool for promoting your business and not just for social purposes. Although it can end up being just another distraction to an already busy day, it can also be another example of where random connections can make a difference in unexpected ways.

It doesn’t only happen online. Out in the real world, you don’t know where a conversation or chance remark might lead, or where talking to a stranger at a network meeting, in a queue, sitting next to someone might take you. I’m often coming across opportunities which seem to pop out of nowhere and as a result of random connections.

How many times have you had a chance meeting or conversation. which has then lead to something unexpected. Keep your eyes open for them.

Online Overwhelm

One thing I’ve been doing more of recently is using Twitter. Now I’ve got several tools set up to make my life a lot easier and save time but there’s no doubt that it’s another source of potential overwhelm. There are only so many people you can follow and so many tweets you can read in a day. If you really did want to keep up with your tens of hundreds or even thousands of followers, you wouldn’t have much of your day left to work.

Yes, it’s a great way to stay in touch with people, you get a quick and easy update about who’s doing what and when and you can respond quickly, ask questions, get answers. Far more quickly than by email or through reading a blog. It’s also a great way to find out useful information but as I said, there’s only so much additional information you can take in and most of us are suffering from information overload already.

Add it to your online marketing arsenal or use it as a tool to keep in touch but be careful about how you’re using it and how much time you spend on it. How does it fit in to your day to day business plan? How are you going to use it to grow your business or keep in touch? There are plenty of people on Twitter who can tell you how. Follow them, learn from them but know what’s really going to make a difference to your business and do that first.

Switch Off

Away this weekend and I left the technology behind for a whole four days. I even survived without the mobile phone for much of it – only using it to contact fellow travellers and make arrangements and once to send a twitter message from the top of a hill, when we took a break in the sunshine.

I did of course come back to a full inbox of emails – mostly junk but quickly dispatched. I’ve never had email on the move, from choice more than limited technology or capability. While it might be useful at times – there is rarely anything that’s so urgent that it won’t wait until I return to the office and clients rarely want or need to contact me out of hours and if they did the phone is a quicker and more reliable means of contact.

I know some people can’t survive without constantly being in touch or being able to send and receive emails at any time of the day and night but there are always other things I can be doing when I have spare time on the move rather than checking emails. I even leave my mobile phone behind or switched off at times and I purposely don’t have all the whizz-bang, bluetooth headset, hands-free, technology. In that respect I’m probably technologically backward but actually, I want to decide what to do when, not have technology deciding for me.

Now the demands of my work are probably different from yours but how attached are you to your technology? Are you really in control of your time and the technology or is it controlling you? While it’s there to make life easier, if can also make it more demanding. Do you find it hard to switch off in case you miss something? How much of a difference will it really make to be instantly contactable?

Think about the technology you use and the way that you use it - could you use it less, have more time for yourself without reducing your productivity?

Are You Hot(mail) Or Not?

What’s your business email address?

I’m always surprised when I come across a business and see that they’re using a Hotmail, BTinternet or Aol address. Now for some small businesses and trades, like my local window cleaner or handyman, this may be fine but what sort of impression does it give to an apparently professional company if your main business address posted on your business cards and literature is a Hotmail or Btinternet email address?

I recently received a professional and impressive looking email promo in my inbox only to see that the business email address is on Aol. What’s more puzzling is that like many of these business, they have a website, so why couldn't they have a info@websitename.com email?

Now, I use several email addresses including Hotmail, Yahoo and Google as a way of organising and filtering my email. But my business cards, leaflets, newsletters, website etc. have an email address connected to my website name.

Perhaps you don’t have a website but it’s easy to register a domain name, set up an email address and then redirect that address to your preferred email account, without having to create and host a website. It doesn’t mean that you have to log in to multiple email accounts – just redirect them to one account.

If you’re in business take the time to create an email address that connects to your business. It gives a better, more professional impression.

Exhibiting At Your First Event

Last week I took part in our local Chamber’s first tradeshow or Showcase as they preferred to call it. A mix of thirty local businesses from Banking to Website Design, covering not just business but also the home.

Attending a trade fair or business event as an exhibitor can be a significant and costly decision. You need to have a balance between the cost and effort involved. It’s not just about the cost of the event itself but also the cost of the advertising, display materials, handouts, products, samples and your time in preparation and marketing for the event.

If you’ve taken the decision to book up your first event then here are a few tips, to make sure you get the most out of the event when you’re actually there.

1. What is your main objective for attending the event? Write it down.

2. Get rid of the chairs behind your stand. There’s nothing more off putting than someone sitting behind their stand, quite possible not even making eye contact with the people walking by. Stand up. Get onto the same eye-level as the people passing by.

3. Even if people aren’t going to buy, don’t let them just walk away or move straight on to the next stand. Entice them to try and buy. Have testers or samples available or something they can sign-up for, information they can take away.

4. Give something away in exchange for their contact details. Have a prize draw for some of your products or services.

5. Engage with your visitor. If someone takes the time to stop at your stand and shows an interest – start a conversation. You don’t need to launch into a sales pitch. Talk about your products – find out about them. Discuss the weather. Anything that will start a conversation.

6. Smile! There’s nothing worse than someone on a stand looking bored or fed-up and it can make a real difference to whether people stop and take a closer look or walk straight past.

7. Oh and if all else fails – have a bowl of sweets. It kept visitors and other exhibitors coming back. :)

Don’t forget to follow-up afterwards and also look at whether you achieved your objective (1), what worked and what didn't.

Meet Your Public

I had the opportunity to be on radio last week. That was certainly something new for me. Several brief interviews, which actually wasn’t that different from talking on the phone – headset on, voice on the end of a phone/microphone.

I spend most of my time working with clients over the phone, which works well but it can become very comfortable, working from home, networking online, writing emails and answering calls but I’ve recently rediscovered the benefits of meeting up with people face-to-face. Not only does it get me out and about – apart from my regular networking meetings but last year, I ran a couple of workshops locally and got a buzz from the synergy that gets created in a group. It’s no longer just about you, your knowledge and expertise, it’s about what else people bring to the group – challenges, ideas, inspiration.

While it’s a well-documented fact that most people don’t like public speaking, there’s no better way to get your message across than talking to people face to face, especially if your business is you and not a product. Whether it’s small or large groups – show your expertise. Talk to people you wouldn’t normally talk to – I’m not necessarily talking about total strangers but groups of people that you may not usually approach. You might find a whole new audience.

It doesn’t have to be that scary. Even the most accomplished speakers get nervous and had that sense of dread when they first started. Build up your confidence with a small group of people you know, practice, get feedback and then find other groups to talk to, who want to hear what you have to say.

Alternatively, if you normally do a lot of talking, try a different from of communication

Can Your Business Survive Without You?

I was talking to a client the other week about how they’ve been in a state of confusion since one of their staff went off sick. They’re a relatively new and growing business and are in the process of moving over to automated systems but at the moment a lot of the information is held in people’s heads or on scraps of paper. Little things get forgotten, the odd order gets missed. When a business is small, this isn’t too much of a problem as most things can be recovered or sorted out at the last minute but as a business grows it needs to be more organised.

If you or one of your key staff got hit by the proverbial bus – would your business continue without you/them? How much information is the sole domain of just one person?

While not everyone needs to know everyone else’s business – important information shouldn’t be in people’s heads or on scraps of paper. Have a way to keep track of what goes in and what goes out – whether it’s paper or computer based and can cope as the business grows or when you’re busy.

Having documentation or at least trackable systems and processes also makes it easier to delegate tasks and particularly at this time of year, might even mean you can allow yourself to go on holiday and relax.

Mind The Gaps

Last week I was busy putting the finishing touches to my book. Every time I’ve been the process of writing a chapter, it seems to be the key topic that one or more of my clients is dealing with. I know that it’s the equivalent of buy a red car and all you see is red cars but I found that because I’d just been honing my writing to deal with a specific topic, I could make it even more relevant to the next conversation and equally, it prompted me to add something to the chapter.

Anyway, that's a bit of an aside, one thing that I learned is that creativity cannot be squeezed into a neatly ordered time slot. In fact my attempts to write a chapter in a few hours failed miserably because while the content was pretty much there, it definitely needed a number of writing sessions, periods of mulling over in-between, reviews and read throughs until the final version was ready to be sent off. I also noticed that when I hit a block, the best thing to do was get up and go and do something else and then come back to it a few minutes or even a couple of hours later.

If you’ve got a similar project you’re trying to get underway – treat the gaps as being just as important as the actual writing. While the physical putting pen to paper might only take a few hours, spread it out over a few days, so that you have plenty of time to think about it, add to it, review it and read it through before you’re finished.

Making Assumptions

We make assumptions all the time. Taking for granted things around us because we think we understand a particular situation or person. When you make assumptions about something or someone what you’re actually doing is guessing. It might be an educated guess, based on the facts and information available at the time. We make decisions based on assumptions and if these assumptions are wrong we can end up in hot water.

However, we need to test our assumptions every now and then to confirm that we do have a correct understanding and actually asking questions can be a good way to make sure that we’re not assuming or presuming too much. If you’re not sure or you think you’re making an assumption then ask. Ask your clients, your friends our your family. Don’t assume that you know all the answers.

What assumptions do you make about situations that you find yourself in every day. What assumptions do you make about the people around you?

Efficient Meetings

We know that people spend far too much time in meetings and that quite often the time spend in travelling to and from a meeting can be greater than the actual meeting itself.

A great way to save time spent on meetings is to set up a meeting using either group conference call facilities or a call over the internet. Rapid changes in technology mean that people across different locations, countries and continents don’t have to travel to take part in the same meeting. Saves huge amount of time for everyone involved if you multiply up the travel time involved in traditional face-to-face meetings.

Teleclasses, workshops and teleseminars can all be presented online with notes displayed in an online ‘classroom’ format with a trainer holding the call and students calling in.

Group conference calls enable people to meet, communicate and discuss key objectives without having to be in the same room. Because there are no visual cues these need to be handled carefully to ensure that everyone is allowed to participate, key points and actions are documented and communication is clear.

Video conferencing – were you can see people at the other end of the phone line – can be useful but can also be distracting and the quality of the technology can make an impact on it’s effectiveness.

If you’re going to use this technology, test it out ahead of time or as a dry run to make sure it works and iron out any hiccups before the actual meeting. There’s nothing worse than trying to sort out the volume and picture signals at the start of the meeting.

Save you and your colleagues time and money and think about the most efficient way to hold your meeting.

Toxic Friends

Do you know someone who actually isn’t the sort of friend you need to have around you? While you may have known them for years – you’ve fallen in to the habit of being friends and the friendship may not actually work any more.

They’re the sort of people who probably don’t even realise they’re doing it but they have a negative outlook on life or worse than that they may spend their time running you down, being negative and taking every opportunity to ‘put you in your place’ whether obviously or in subtle ways. We all have our down times when we might have a moan and whinge and be negative and need to lean on our friends but people who always burden you with their problems and suck you in to their negative way of thinking, are not the sort of people you need in your life.

There needs to be a balance. If a person is consistently unsupportive, demanding, over critical, lets you down and you feel emotionally drained after you’ve spent time with them, that’s not a good friendship to have. They can affect your own self-esteem and affect you physically and mentally. To keep the friendship, you’ll need to tell them when they’re behaving badly, set clear boundaries, learn to say no and make sure you’re looking after yourself.

If they’re not willing to change or accept what you’re saying, then you may need to think about ending the friendship or at least putting some distance between you and see less of each other. If you want to keep the friend, recognise them for who they are and choose how much time you decide to spend with them. Take responsibility for how you feel and if it’s something you can manage.

You can change yourself but you can’t change your friends.

Don't Just Sit There!

I was helping out at a local event yesterday. It was a Christmas event with a mix of arts and crafts, beauty products and several small businesses and a couple of charity groups. There weren’t that many people coming through the doors but I probably managed to speak to most of them and came away with a large number of contacts to follow-up. A successful event as far as I was concerned.

However, many of the other exhibitors were just sitting behind their stalls, waiting for someone to come and buy whatever it was they were selling. Mostly looking miserable and complaining about the poor response. Now, not everyone is looking for what they’ve got but it might have helped if people had at least stood up and attempted to engage with the people passing by. It’s the same in business – if you’ve got something to offer, then don’t just sit there waiting for the phone to ring – get out there and start connecting, whether in person or virtually. Even if you have the most fantastic product – unless you tell people about it, how will they know what you’re offering and how to find you?

So many people yesterday were missing an opportunity to get contact details from the people that were there. They wasting even more of the time and energy they’d invested in getting there by not making the most of the opportunity, even if the turnout was low. While people may not want to buy straight away, get their contact details so you can stay in touch. A regular newsletter is a great way of doing this, especially if you’ve got a special offer or prize draw.

What tips and ideas have worked for you at an event or exhibition?

Not Turning Up

Last week seemed to be a week of cancellations and missed appointments.

Now I know that life gets in the way and we can't always allow for the unexpected but do you often end up having to cancel things at the last minute. People often seem to take the time and effort to book, register or sign-up for meetings, seminars and workshops and then just not turn up. Sometimes they may have a valid reason, sometimes it’s just a symptom of disorganisation, poor planning or over commitment.

If you've agreed to be there - the expectation is that you are going to turn up. If you have to change your plans or realise that you can't make it, call the person at the first and earliest opportunity to let them know. They've made an effort to arrange things in the first place, so respect the other person’s time as much as you would expect someone to respect yours.

Many people seem to say yes when what they actually mean is, probably not or they haven’t really thought about it but just say yes anyway. If you're always saying yes to things and then not turning up or letting people down at the last minute, start being more realistic with your time. Don’t say yes if you’re not sure. Don't over commit - make a tentative arrangement if you need to and then confirm nearer the time but agree this upfront, so that the other person isn't left in doubt or can follow-up if they haven’t heard from you.

What gets in your way to make you miss an appointment, you've committed to?

What can you change so that you don't make commitments you can't keep?

Ask For What You Want

Do you say what you think or do you just leave it up to guesswork and hope that the other person will take note of your subtle hints. I’ve often noticed a lack of communication that occurs between some couples. They seem to work on the basis of either indirect comments or psychic abilities as their way of communicating with their partner. Surprisingly this rarely works and misunderstanding and needless arguments can occur as a result.

There’s an expectation that the other person will somehow realise how they’re feeling or what it is that they want or need. When they get it wrong, it is of course all their fault. How were they to know that their partner would like them to do the washing, pick up the shopping, doesn’t like something or hates that particular restaurant, if they’ve never said so or asked. Subtle communication doesn’t always work, even when people know each other well.

If the message isn’t getting through, don’t just shrug, sigh or assume they’re being insensitive and keep things bottled up inside. Think about it. Have you ever actually asked? Not with an indirect, ambiguous comment, made as an aside but saying clearly and simply what it is that you want.

Don’t expect people to get everything right first time either. Take some time to allow them to make mistakes and learn and perhaps lower your standards of perfection and be more forgiving. Not everyone is as perfect as you and so what if things don’t get done to your exacting standards – as long as they get done and your relationship improves as a result.

Get Over Yourself

Sometimes we can take things a bit too personally – especially ourselves. We try to be all things to all people, both in business and in our personal life but it’s just not possible. As the saying goes:

“You can please some of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time”.

While we all want to get things right, some people will never be happy with what you do, what you say or how you say it, however hard you try. When I first started up in business I wanted to get everything right and wanted things to be perfect, so took every comment and criticism as a personal slight. These days I’ve toughened up a bit and realise that just because one person doesn’t like something I’ve written or said, it doesn’t mean that everyone else feels the same way and that I instantly need to make a change just to please them.

By all means listen to feedback or constructive comments – especially if you’re hearing it from someone who actually knows what they’re talking about or you're hearing the same thing being said more than once. If someone you don’t know and have never met says something against you, don’t take it personally. It may not be about you. Realise that the fact they're having a rant at you, is probably saying far more about him or her than whatever it is that you may have done. If you do tend to react personally and emotionally, take a deep breath, step away from the situation for a while and don’t respond until you’ve had time to calm down and think in a less reactive and more controlled way. Putting a little time between yourself and the issue or person can help.

Have confidence in yourself and what you do and as long as you can look yourself in the mirror and know that you’ve acted in good faith and with integrity, then stop trying to change yourself just to please everyone else.

Life’s too short.

Watch What You Say

I just came across this quote and thought it was appropriate, not just to the spoken word but here on the internet - particularly in the world of blogs and discussion groups where words - whether written in jest or not, can be open to a completely different interpretation from what might have been intended, when they land in someone’s inbox, discussion group or blog.

"Know that a word suddenly shot from the tongue is like an arrow shot from the bow. Son, that arrow won't turn back on its way; you must damn the torrent at its source." - Rumi

Don't jump to conclusions, just because you've read something that presses your buttons, particularly if you don't know the sender. I’ve seen several discussions that could be viewed as bullying or insulting that were actually friendly banter and tongue in cheek sarcasm but you would only know this if you knew the background and personalities involved.

Do they know each other and are you viewing a discussion as an outsider? Do you know the person involved? Do you know how they might be thinking or feeling? Re-read the text but take a different viewpoint. How would you read and interpret this message if it was written by a friend? Think about how your words could be interpreted by someone not in the ‘know’.

Remember that tone, feelings and the more subtle aspects of humour are difficult to convey in the written word. The same sentence read with different intonation and emphasis can be interpreted completely differently.

Looking back at the quote - if you have the habit of putting your foot in it it's worth spending a few minutes to think before you speak. At least take time to read what you've said before you hit send or be prepared to deal with the effect should the arrow find a different 'target' from the one that you intended.

If you have something important to say and you don’t want your message mis-interpreted, try it out on someone else. Sometimes we can have such a fixed viewpoint on something that we might be very familiar with, that we miss the obvious.